It's Facebook Officially OVER

The worst part of the relationship is the end, usually in that particular moment it is anyway. However, usually you pick yourself up in the end and you move on. Break-ups are never easy, whether you are the dumper or the dumpee, it's difficult. Sometimes girls have a tendency to blame themselves for why the relationship didn't work out, however most of the time it was him not you. Stop blaming yourself for why the relationship didn't work out and focus on moving on.

Yet, sometimes the dumpee is oblivious to why they have been dumped. In some cases, there was no reason besides the fact, the guy you chose to go out with, he wasn't who you thought he was. In other cases, it was you. This may be hard to hear, but no one's perfect, if you can't admit to that, at least, then the break up was definitely because of you. Guys are usually laid back, they don't want to have a clingy girlfriend, they don't want to have to tell you why they're with you 24/7, of course if there's no 'compassion', you need someone better. What I'm saying though is that most guys want a confident, independent girl who knows what she wants.

"Closure." I'm sorry, but I believe this whole "closure" business is ridiculous in most cases. Usually you're not going to sit down with your ex and decide why he has decided to break up with you or vice versa. Honestly, the best "closure" you can get is moving on. Think about it in the most positive way you can, it's not the end of the world and you'll survive.

I think it's definitely okay to have time to sulk, be pissed off, or hurt, in some cases all three. There comes a time though that you need to move on. 1) Hang out with your friends. 2) Meet new people and socialize. 3) Do something that you weren't "allowed" to do in the relationship---FLIRT.

DO NOT:1) look for a rebound. First off it makes you look desperate: Second someone usually always gets hurt: Third you usually don't feel any better about yourself and: Fourth with girls especially you can get a bad reputation.

2) Incessantly talk about the person, there comes to a point where the "sulking" period is over. I'd give it at most 2 weeks, but thinking that the relationship was amazing the entire time is irrational. If it was so "perfect", the relationship wouldn't have ended. I understand it's hard moving on from a long term relationship, especially when it hits years, but the worst thing you can do is harp on why it didn't workout.

What do you do after the "sulking" period?

MOVE ON. It's the only thing you can do, sure it's going to be tough. And yeah, it's going to really stink for a while, it's going to stink when he gets a new girlfriend, but you need to move on. Occupy yourself with something, call a friend to distract you. Eventually, he becomes part of your past, and you learn something from each relationship.

What if he wants to get back together?

I think that once something is over, it should stay over. There's a reason why it didn't work out the first time. Though, some believe in second chances, this very well may be true, but I say after the second chance, there should be no more chances allowed.

Can we still be friends?

I think so, but to an extent. When one of my really good guy friends and I broke up, we stayed friends, because we were before hand definitely contributed to that. However, there's a line, you can't treat each other like bf/gf, you're strictly FRIENDS now. Don't do anything you wouldn't do in front of your other guy friends.

Break ups stink, but it's part of growing up. As long as you take something away from the break up you're not really losing anything. There are millions and millions of people, don't think you'll never find anyone. High school isn't the only place where you'll find someone, who knows where you'll meet someone, but you need to move on from each relationship and don't hang in the past.

xoxo KKSM